Patchwork Universe

Trubshawe · Good Joined: 19 Mar 2004 Posts: 351 Location: The Zoo

A new dawn had broken bright and clear over the Zoo. Trubshawe inhaled deeply and pondered the strangeness of the first full day of his new life as an unwilling guest of the iniquitous Gods. The air here smelt as good and healthful as ever, and yet not two miles to the south was the choking mustiness of the Museum, not two miles to the east the miasmic vapours emanating from the dark secret rooms buried too shallowly beneath Jones'. Would the Zoo find itself polluted in the end by such undesirable neighbours? Trubshawe shook his head grimly.

On a whim he had ordered his Assistant Zookeepers to set up a breakfast table on a high island in the middle of the lion enclosure, and there it was that he and Von Damme sat sipping tea from delicate porcelain cups while the big cats stalked around them restlessly. He was rather pleased with the overall effect, especially as he had thought to change into his best Head Zookeeper's uniform, which was cream-coloured rather than the orthodox grey. He always thought it made him look nicely dictatorial.

He set his cup down, dabbed at his lips and addressed Von Damme. "I trust you slept well, Captain?"

Dr James Kirby · Good Joined: 02 Jul 2004 Posts: 214 Location: Empire City

"Oh, indeed Mr Trubshawe. Once you become accustomed to the swaying of the zeppelin, it swiftly becomes a most relaxing sensation."

Von Damme looked at their surroundings with mixed approval. On the one hand, he could not deny the majesty of the gesture. On the other hand, the smell. The zoo wasn't the most appealing of smells, but right in the middle of the enclosure, it was overpowering. Trubshawe seemed not to notice. Von Damme wondered if he had a sense of smell at all by now.

Still, as theatrics go, it was pretty good. Von Damme had been known to maintain a pirahna tank himself.

"So, Mr Trubshawe, we are trapped on the wrong side of the bars in a clockwork universe. How do we go about reversing this situation?"

Trubshawe · Good Joined: 19 Mar 2004 Posts: 351 Location: The Zoo

"Let me tell you, Captain Von Damme, what I learned from my Assistants last night. During my recent brief absence from the Zoo, one of the 'Gods' of this place, who apparently goes by the absurd sobriquet of Mrs Y, entered bold as brass through the front gates, with what nefarious intentions I hesitate to consider. Confronted by the only on-duty staff member, she threatened him and set a small but savage animal on him, before causing a cage to materialise around him and spirit him away to her own domain. She might easily have wreaked utter havoc on the premises then, but fortunately some sort of emergency arose and she teleported herself away in an eyeblink."

Trubshawe sipped his tea angrily.

"Clearly we have to take up arms against these beings as quickly and as strenuously as possible. But as you will have already picked up from my story, their powers are not inconsiderable. Being able to teleport matter apparently at whim is a vexingly high level of technology, or at least a great talent with smoke and mirrors. Either way, if we jump the gun and try to take these people on without adequate preparation, we invite a truly humiliating defeat.

"My proposal is this. There are a number of others in much the same situation as ourselves. Being generally more lacking in wit and initiative than us, though, they are stumbling around lost and afraid. Some of them, I'm sorry to say, have already been bought by the Gods' beads and trinkets and now willingly do their bidding. What we must do is convince the rest that it is these preening prestidigitators that are their true enemy. And also, that if we join forces, we can destroy them, and thereby regain control of our destinies."

Dr James Kirby · Good Joined: 02 Jul 2004 Posts: 214 Location: Empire City

"You are of course correct. Whilst I acknowledge no god over me, the superior nature of the technology arrayed against us can't be denied."

"We certainly need to gather allies, though unless we can view one of these people as near equals, then they are better employed as pawns. They can advance our plans without knowing the detail."

"Our first step, I think, is reconnaissance. From where is this Universe controlled? If we can find that out, without making our intentions clear, then we might probe it for weaknesses. I believe that we may take by stealth that which is impossible to defeat by force."

Trubshawe · Good Joined: 19 Mar 2004 Posts: 351 Location: The Zoo

"I suspect you're right," mused Trubshawe. I myself have experienced only three domains other than the Zoo: a large but rather vulgar Museum, a school for adolescents, and the medieval hostelry in which you first came across me. My assistant has seen a few others, but his accounts were rather garbled and of little value. For all I know there may be hundreds, or thousands of these 'Patches'.

"A thorough exploration of this brave new world will be made much easier by your dirigible. We could cover a wide area in a short time, determine how deep this pocket universe actually is."

Dr James Kirby · Good Joined: 02 Jul 2004 Posts: 214 Location: Empire City

"Now, that sounds like a capital plan. Immediately valuable, and easy enough to execute. Each of these domains appears to be roughly three miles across, so I estimate that we might survey as many as twenty in an hour. And it is certainly a pleasant way to spend a morning."

Trubshawe · Good Joined: 19 Mar 2004 Posts: 351 Location: The Zoo

"Excellent," said Trubshawe. "Then it's -"

At that moment a red light began to flash on his wrist chronometer, which simultaneously began to emit frantic bleeping noises.

"What in...? Excuse me one moment." Trubshawe reached for a large plastic object on the table that Von Damme had assumed to be a butterdish and held it to his ear. "Speak to me. Intruders? On my way. Oh, and Daltrey, better stop by the arsenal on the way and pick up a couple of energy rifles, and anything else that takes your fancy. Over and out."

His face had hardened. "It appears we have another security breach, at the eastern perimeter. Another God paying me a little visit, I'll be bound. Well, this time they won't get away without a fight. If you've finished your breakfast, Captain, would you care to join us?"

Dr James Kirby · Good Joined: 02 Jul 2004 Posts: 214 Location: Empire City

Von Damme drew a long, chromed pistol from his coat. Rather than a single barrel, it had a pepperbox of one millimeter wide holes.

"Delighted."

Trubshawe · Good Joined: 19 Mar 2004 Posts: 351 Location: The Zoo

Trubshawe and Von Damme extricated themselves from the middle of the enclosure via a narrow gangplank beneath which hungry lions paced. They hurried together through the Zoo, Trubshawe maintaining an extremely brisk pace, until they caught sight of Daltrey up ahead, struggling with both a small crate and a couple of bulky futuristic-looking guns

"I'll take one of those," bellowed Trubshawe upon intercepting his Assistant. "Let's see if Gods can make themselves disappear faster than a speeding energy projectile. Onwards! No, wait."

The Head Zookeeper had spotted something suspicious. Atop one of the signposts directing visitors to various of the exhibits was an incongruous plain brass arrow that pointed not to anything in the Zoo, but straight in the direction of the rising sun.

"Daltrey - you wouldn't happen to know anything about this?" snarled Trubshawe. It only took a moment of his Assistant looking completely blank for his fears to be confirmed.

"Those Gods again. What do they think gives them the right? Stand back, the pair of you."

He raised his energy rifle, found the arrow in the centre of the gunsight and squeezed the trigger...

Dr James Kirby · Good Joined: 02 Jul 2004 Posts: 214 Location: Empire City

Von Damme knocked Trubshawe's gun aside at the last moment.

"Hold! First - what is it? What does it indicate? We must gain all the knowledge we can from their works, rather than destroying them on sight. Indeed, destroying their works on sight marks one out as an iconoclast, something we can perhaps ill afford at this stage in our campaign."

Trubshawe · Good Joined: 19 Mar 2004 Posts: 351 Location: The Zoo

The energy bolt went wide, fizzling out high in the air, and Trubshawe whirled on Von Damme, his face contorted with anger. But he seemed to swallow down his rage almost instantly and was a model of composure when he opened his mouth to reply:

"Good thinking. I shall order it taken down for analysis while we deal with these intruders." He flipped open a hatch in the trunk of the signpost, pulled out a communications handset and spoke into it. "Specks, someone has affixed a foreign object, some sort of brass arrow to the top of signpost one-one-seven. We have a break-in to deal with, if you could take it down in the meantime and have it ready for our return."

He snapped the signpost shut again and hefted his rifle. "Enough of the sideshows. Onto the main event."

Trubshawe · Good Joined: 19 Mar 2004 Posts: 351 Location: The Zoo

The three of them jogged around one final corner, and a wide avenue sloped gently downwards from their position to the penguin exhibit. It was still too far away to make out precise details, but a number of human shapes were clearly visible picking their way to the edge of the enclosure.

"Lots of them!" hissed Trubshawe. "We'd better fan out. Don't let them get into the caribou."

Trubshawe · Good Joined: 19 Mar 2004 Posts: 351 Location: The Zoo

[OOC: This thread now merges into "Pirates meet penguins", and can be considered closed.]